I have written this blog post a million times in my head but it was nothing like this.
Here is my truth:
I sold my machine.
It was time.
To be completely honest, my life is in a state of limbo, hopefully the next few months will bring forward movement and some sort of focus. Until then, I suppose I just need to have faith, something I have never really had much of. I am exhausted with the quilting industry and all of the drama and bullshit that has found its way into the craft of creating something warm and soft. I don't have the personality or the patience to deal with it. Over the years, being on the side of the industry that I have found myself on ( aka: trying to "make it" in the industry) has felt less and less about talent/artistry and love of the art/craft and more about keeping up with the social media beast, and being good at marketing. It's not my jam. Never was, clearly, never will be.
It has always been my goal to put out positive energy, especially through social media like this, we all know that whatever you put out there comes back, right?
Well, honesty feels better than force feeding myself and you all an illusion.
I am not all that happy or positive right now. I am sad that I spent the last ten years of the only real "career" I've ever had in an industry that I no longer trust. Maybe I have brought this on myself, I suppose that lies ahead for me to figure out. At the end of the day, I realized I chose to let it become a burden and I had to let it go, so I did.
What is next?
Two weeks from now I'll be teaching MQX Midwest. I love this show, I attended it very early on in my career, as a student, and I am happily headed there to teach my heart out for probably the last time, to those of you who are able to attend. My classes are ALL still open including my hands on classes, click here if you want to catch this last gig.
From there, I just hope to sit on the other side of the industry and make stuff, from my heart. Simple. I guess.
Looking happy but honestly a little out of sorts and kind of nervous about what is next, and wondering, "did I make the right decision?" and knowing it's too late to look back.
Here's what I am currently working on:
Yes, these make me happy.
This glorious pattern is the Octagon Shimmer Quilt by Jennifer Sampou. I can not say enough good things about this quilt or its instructions. Click for the pattern here
I hope that I have explained myself well enough for those of you who have wondered what happened. As it turns out, nothing really "happened". I just needed to let go and move on.